So, as a few of you may know, I am a HUGE X-Files fan. I have Mulder and Scully Barbies. Legit, made by Mattel Barbies. In the original box, never opened. Yep.
So of course I was a little excited about the new X-Files film. We'll say "conservatively" excited. Because it has been six years since the X-Files went off the air, and while I am crazy obsessed, I haven't really been feeling a void.
Apparently Chris Carter has. And of course many, many other fans have been too. I know because I went to a midnight showing last night, and it was packed. OK, that was only because AMC had chosen to show the film on one screen in its tiniest theater.
Look, I'm not going to offer any spoilers. It wouldn't even matter. Nothing fucking happens in the movie.
OK... actually shit happens... it just isn't interesting. It's like a really long, boring season 8 episode, but with Mulder instead of Terminator Guy.
Gillian looks gorgeous... David looks like he's melting. and SPOILER ALERT!!!! Mitch Pillegi. (Skinner) looks about the same.
So... why did they bother? With this script I mean. Why didn't they wait and do something NOT BORING? This was, seriously, a Lifetime movie. Without Meredith Baxter.
There were cute, self-referential moments... but eh. I would have been willing to wait another few years for a GOOD movie. On TV, even.
Go see it if you are a fan, I guess. But otherwise it isn't even a half rate movie of the week. Such a shame.